The Things Nobody Warned Us About — A Friday List for the Woman Who Shows Up
Educational Review: Her Parents Help Editorial Team
Content Type: Research-Informed Caregiver Support
🇪🇸 Versión en Español disponible aquí → Las cosas que nadie nos dijo — Una lista de viernes para la mujer que aparece💜
The Things Nobody Warned Us About — A Friday List for the Woman Who Shows Up
Happy Friday, friend.
You made it through another week. Pour yourself something warm, find a quiet corner, and give yourself exactly five minutes that belong entirely to you.
This one is for the moments that did not make it into the family group chat. The ones you could not explain to anyone who has not lived it. The ones that made you laugh so hard you almost cried — or cried so hard you almost laughed.
You know the ones.
The Moment She Asked You the Same Question for the Fourteenth Time
And somewhere between the eighth and the twelfth time you stopped answering with the real answer and started just saying yes.
"Is today Sunday?" Yes, Mommy.
"Did I take my pills?" Yes, Mommy.
"Is that your father's car in the driveway?" Dad has been gone for eleven years but — yes, Mommy. Sure.
Nobody tells you that caregiving will turn you into the world's most committed improv actor. You just learn to say yes and redirect. Yes and redirect. Yes and redirect.
And somehow it works every time.
The Great Medication Standoff of Whenever
You put the pill in her hand. She puts it in her mouth. You watch. You wait. You look away for three seconds to answer a text. You look back. The pill is on the counter.
You have no idea how she did it. You watched the whole thing. You are a grown adult with functional eyesight and she still managed to un-swallow a pill like a magic trick.
You put it back in her hand. You do not look away this time. You stand there like a security guard at a jewelry store. She stares at you. You stare at her. It is a standoff. It lasts forty-five seconds. She wins anyway.
You are not sure how. You may never know.
The Doctor Visit Performance
You spent three days writing down symptoms. You made a list. You had notes. You rehearsed what you were going to say.
The doctor walked in and your mother became a completely different person.
She laughed. She charmed. She said she felt wonderful. She told the doctor a story about her neighbor's cat that had absolutely nothing to do with why you were there. The doctor laughed. Your mother laughed. Everyone was having a lovely time.
You sat in the corner holding your symptom list like a prop in a play nobody told you was a comedy.
The Food Situation
She will not eat what you made her. She specifically asked for what you made her. Yesterday she ate the same thing and called it delicious. Today it is wrong. She cannot explain how it is wrong. It is just wrong.
You make her something else.
She eats four bites and says she is not hungry.
You eat the rest standing over the kitchen sink at 9pm wondering when you last sat down for a meal that did not involve negotiation.
The Outfit That Has Achieved Legendary Status
You know the one. The pink house dress. The blue cardigan. The specific pair of pants that she has worn in some rotation for the last eight months.
You have tried to retire them. They keep reappearing. You have washed them so many times the color is a memory of its original self. She does not care. They are her outfit. You are just the laundry service.
You have made peace with it. Mostly.
The TV Remote Situation
The remote is lost. The remote is always lost. The remote was in her hand twelve minutes ago and now it has vanished from the physical plane of existence.
You have found it in the refrigerator. You have found it in her shoe. You have found it under the dog. You have found it in places that defy the laws of physics and basic human logic.
You have started buying backup remotes. You have hidden backup remotes. The backup remotes are also missing.
This is your life now. You have accepted it with a grace that frankly deserves recognition.
And Then There Are the Moments That Catch You Off Guard
You are helping her with her shoes. Just tying her shoes like you have done a hundred times. And she looks up at you and says — completely out of nowhere — you were always the one I worried about the least. Because I always knew you would be okay.
And you sit there on the floor next to her feet holding a shoelace and you do not know whether to laugh or cry so you do both a little and then you tie the shoe and you say okay Mommy, let's go.
And you carry that sentence with you for the rest of the day. Probably longer.
You Are More Than Okay
You are exhausted and capable and funny and devoted and running on coffee and love and sheer determination. You are doing something hard every single day and doing it with more grace than you give yourself credit for.
The pill that keeps reappearing. The remote that lives in the refrigerator. The doctor visit where you were accidentally cast in a one-woman show. The outfit that will outlive you both.
These are your stories. And one day you will tell them and laugh until your stomach hurts.
You are making memories even in the chaos. Especially in the chaos.
Happy Friday. You showed up again. That is everything.
Caregiver Corner posts every Friday — just for you.For the woman who shows up. Para la mujer que aparece.hermidlifewellnesshelp.com
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